SCHULTZ, STEVEN I Forgot To Get A Rap Name (Spam Records) cd 8.98
This Schultz classic has been redone, rerecorded (!) and repackaged for those of you that missed out the first time. Here's what we had to say about it:
You may have seen Steven Schultz reading and eating donuts in the front row of the Mayhem show. Or you may remember him in pigtails and pajamas eating prunes in the pit at the Hammers Of Misfortune show. Or you may remember his hilarious and amazing lo-fi Naked City-ish 'History Of Vats' cd from a few years back. Or you may not know him at all. This cd marks SS's first recorded foray into the world of rap music, and boy, it's something. Musically notable for the fact that the instruments are all real (all played by the multitalented Steve), and dramatically notable for the fact that the skits are all acted out by Steven's friends. And then there's the rapping. White and whiney as you may have expected, but lyrically, well, no one could have expected anyone to take on the persona of a rapping pirate ('Call Me Pinkbeard'), a rapping whale ('Fuck A Harpoon'), a rapping goth ('I Got Bigger Hair Than Robert Smith'), or a rapping eskimo ('Maniac With An Igloo'). Then there's Steve's attack on rap-metal ('Rap-Metal Is Funny')... Yes, it's incredibly dumb, but undeniably fucked and funny. Self-produced cd-r with color cover (art by Steve) and oh-so-essential lyric sheet. Maybe not the next Eminem, but perhaps the next MC Paul Barman?
RealAudio clip: "Fuck A Harpoon"
RealAudio clip: "Call Me Pinkbeard, Mistress Of The High Seas"

SCHULTZ, STEVEN AND FRIENDS Stalin Claus Superstar! (Spam Records) 4cd 14.98
On New Arrivals list #301, we began a perhaps ill advised campaign to relist all of the insane and ridiculous releases by long time aQ pal, and musical, um... genius, Steven Schultz. Now living in Japan, with a wife and a child, he left us a stash of records, so we could spread the word to a whole new generation! Folks who just discovered aQ and the list, might have missed out on some of these gems, none more over the top, baffling and befuddling than this massive 4cd rock opera. Here's what we had to say about it when we first listed it way back in 2001. But be warned, only a very few can handle the brain frying whatthefuck that is STALIN CLAUS SUPERSTAR!!!
Subtitled, Another Suplex Prune Hittite Fantasy! But we think this needs a little more explanation. Argh. Ok, some of you will remember Steven Schultz for his remarkable History of Vats cd, or his rap album, the I Forgot To Get A Rap Name! cd-r. Now, although I doubt the world is ready, he unleashes his most absurd opus yet: the three-and-a-half-hour, four-cd boxed-set rock opera "Stalin Claus Superstar!". And it's only 15 bucks (how do they do it?). Yes, Steve, with co-composer/collaborator Jason Kocol (who, in a small-world-after-all twist, was second runner up in the Guitar Godathon contest that Allan got to judge a few years back!) and a cast of thousands, have created what must be the most STUPID yet impressively massive and well-executed (and thus, sad) home-recorded rock opera (or anything) ever! Musically, this ranges from faux-soundtrack orchestrations to circus-y Frank Zappa/Mr. Bungle goofiness to pretty excellent black metal pastiche and indie-rock parody. Did we mention Frank Zappa? Yes. And if 4-cds of just the music itself wouldn't drive you insane, then there's the crucial matter of the lyrics. This is where it gets *really* stupid. The opera is about, uh, ohmigod I can't cope... concepts/characters like Captain Lou Albano and his Evil Black Metal Beardhairs, a Hittite Salesman, Hulk Hogan, a singing bedpan, Retin-A, Spectral Carl Sagan...argh. Here are some of the song titles: "The Bodyslamming of the Flowcharts in Full Effect", "Check Your Elf Before You Wreck Your Elf", "Fuckin' Ancient Sumer", "Self-Ripping Shirt Negotiations In Grueling Detail"...argh. I give up. Let me just quote from Steve's introduction in the liner notes, where he both describes the opera and attempts to pre-empt criticism: "...the plot ties together cutting-edge neurobiology, pro wrestling, the secrets of Stonehenge, Black Metal madness, the hidden connection between Santa and Stalin, Bronze age tribes of the Mideast, the spread of media empires via satellite communication, and of course the archeological ramifications of the Slim Jim. Why? Why take on a musical project as insanely difficult as it is totally unnecessary? Why do something so complex as to baffle all but the most intelligent, and yet so juvenile as to alienate anyone with half a brain? So preposterous it would embarrass Wagner, yet so...well anyway... The answer is simple: this opera answers the universal human questions of our age...Why do we grow old and die? How does Retin-A really work? What's in that omelet? What happens if a bunch of senile Systems Analysts shoot Randy Savage's brain at an unsuspecting Iraqi plum farmer who fancies himself a Muslim Marqui Marq? Well perhaps the answer to the last question is common knowledge these days, what with the 'internet' and all, but clearly Americans are ready to ask the other questions. If you really want to know the hidden connection between Stalinism and Stonehenge, would you trust N'Sync to provide all the answers? Garth Brooks? Deicide??? No, you'll have to turn to us -- the 'operageneers'!"
The four cds come packaged in a cardboard box, complete with a thick booklet providing you with the entire libretto, and more. Basically, this is the Conet Project of "comedy"! (that is, if you can consider this comedy...)
This also features a special guest star, a certain local metal singer who desperately desires to remain anonymous, who, as a favor for Steve, played the role of Hulk Hogan! ...I also think I heard Bob Dylan on here...
So, if you think pro wrestling characters from the '80s are amusing and that the slang term 'hella' is funny and you like Frank Zappa, or if you are simply a connoisseur of the idiotically ridiculous, this is for you!! Don't say we didn't warn you. Basically, if you can stand to listen to the entire thing, you've got problems. (See http://www.hellodamage.com/warusaru/stalinclaus/finalflow2.gif for a helpful flowchart explaining the, uh, plot.)
MPEG Stream: "Kaos In My Beard"
MPEG Stream: "Untitled"

SCOTT-HERON, GIL I'm New Here (XL Recordings) cd 13.98
We weren't expecting to like this as much as we do, but this record really kills!! His first recording in 16 years, Gil Scott-Heron doesn't overindulge, rather I'm New Here shows a much leaner and meaner side to this artist who has never had a hard time examining his demons. "Me and The Devil" is a contender for single of the year as this Robert Johnson blues classic gets a dark almost Portishead-like update. But this isn't just a younger makeover for a classic artist, it's closer in kin to the respectful reinvigoration of Johnny Cash's later American releases. The arrangements are spare, though inspired by the minimal chill of dubstep in parts, they suit Scott-Heron's tough spoken word turns that pepper the album throughout. The Bill Callahan-penned title track sounds like a world-weary folk dirge from the early seventies by Lee Hazlewood that is a stand-out among manyon here. A fine return to form!
MPEG Stream: "Me & The Devil"
MPEG Stream: "I'm New Here"
MPEG Stream: "I'll Take Care of You"

SESAME STREET Old School Vol. 1 (E1 Entertainment) 3cd 22.00
Yeah, we're bustin' it out super old school. No joke, the three records in this set were released four decades ago! Each remastered album comes packaged in a cardboard sleeve with its original cover art, and all three are bundled together in a slipcover. We only wish they'd included a booklet of some sort, but alas, 'tis not to be. Oh well, since these Sesame Street treasures have never been previously released on cd, this is still a very welcome reissue! Anyhoo, let us stress that while we're for sure having some warm nostalgic fuzzies, we're definitely not on some irony-laden trip here. Although the show was originally meant for preschoolers, anyone who is young at heart will surely find the music delightful. It's silly and playful and educational, but not vacuously happy nor excessively simple. The television show's musical staff featured some totally exceptional musicians and some totally ace hook-writing composers. Of course, the latter was ideal for the purposes of facilitating the learning of mathematics, language skills, social studies, geography, science, art, and of course music, but it also just makes for a super fun listen! Musical styles run the gamut from straight-laced Welk-ish orchestrations to ragtime follies to banjo jamborees to kicky bass'n'tambourine funkiness and beyond.
The first album from 1970 starts with (what else but) the theme song sung by the original cast of kids, then slips right into a meeting of Gordon (the first "Gordon" Matt Robinson), Susan, Big Bird, and the alphabet (note: this song also appears on the second disc for reasons that become readily apparent). The nineteen songs touch on a well rounded variety of youngster focused subjects, and in true '70s album fashion, The Sesame Street Record works just as well as a single start-to-finish listening experience or broken up into individual tunes. It's definitely the most traditionally educational of the three, but inarguably the standout tracks are Oscar The Grouch's "I Love Trash" and Ernie's "Rubber Duckie".
1974's Big Bird Sings (love the cover!) is next, and despite its title it features fourteen songs not just sung by the giant yellow feathered friend, but also duets with Oscar, Snuffleupagus, Ernie, Bert, Cookie Monster and others friends from the neighborhood (including the second "Gordon" Hal Miller). While this record didn't have any obvious hits, it did have a subplot about Big Bird and his poetic endeavors. Think of this one as the Sesame Street sleeper!
1975's Bert & Ernie Sing-Along follows with yes, a sing along! The cast (including "Gordon" #3 Roscoe Orman) all squeeze into the bathroom for the tuneful festivities while Bert is in the tub because as Ernie states "everyone sounds better singing in the bathroom." The twenty one song selections on this album include a mix of Sesame Street originals like "C Is For Cookie", "What's The Name Of That Song?" and "Bats In My Belfry" (yes, it's sung by The Count!), as well as some old standards such as "Old MacDonald Had A Farm" and "Row Your Boat".
With the recent flurry of fine'n'dandy children's albums by contemporary artists such as They Might Be Giants, Jon Langford and Kelly Hogan's Wee Hairy Beasties or Duplex from Vancouver, it's really great to be able to visit (or revisit) some of the O.G. purveyors of the genre. The upstarts come close, but who can hold a candle to the Sesame Street gang?! We have a sneakin' suspicion that these albums were a prime source of inspiration for them as well as for countless other 40-ish (non-kids-related) music artists back in their own formative years. Recommended for young'uns and older'uns too. We can't wait for Volume 2!
PS: And for those of you wondering why we are singling out the Gordons? Well, somewhat puzzlingly, there was never any explanation given for each casting change. Did they think no one would question it? Little Cup sure did!
MPEG Stream: "I Love Trash"
MPEG Stream: "The Number Five"
MPEG Stream: "Y'All Fall Down"
MPEG Stream: "What's The Name Of That Song?"

SHAGGS Philosophy of the World (RCA) cd 16.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
I really love this album.
Championed by Lester Bangs, Terry Allen of NRBQ, and Frank Zappa, who famously claimed the Wiggins sisters to be "better than the Beatles."
Perhaps the ultimate "outsider music" album, there's the obvious element of "so-bad-it's-good" or, for some, "so-bad-it's-excruciating," but deeper listens to the Shaggs yield rewards beyond surface novelty. No, they couldn't play well- the girls felt they really needed more practice before recording an album- but the resulting sounds, existing in realms apart from any usual notions of tempo, rythm or melody- are bafflingly compelling in their expressiveness.

SHATNER, WILLIAM The Transformed Man (Varese Sarabande/BMG) cd 16.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Finally (legally) reissued.

SHEARER, HARRY Songs Pointed & Pointless (Courgette) cd 14.98
When we heard that there was a new music album by Harry Shearer, two words jumped eagerly into our heads: Derek Smalls! Then another two: Mark Shubb! Alright, of course we all know that Harry Shearer has done so much more amazing stuff than portraying those two unforgettable musical characters (in the metal mockumentary Spinal Tap and the country/folk mockumentary A Mighty Wind respectively). They're only two of the innumerable very different facets of this man's genius (actor, writer, voice of numerous Simpsons characters, radio host of the NPR program Le Show, the list goes on).
We have to admit tho', much as we love Shearer and his thought provoking and funnybone tickling work, this album ain't doin' it for us... but then again maybe he didn't make it for us. Maybe he's chosen not to preach to the converted as it were. On Songs Pointed & Pointless, Shearer has planted his social and political critiques in a musical style that for the most part appeals to a very conservative (taste-wise, not politically) audience. Sure his lyrics are loaded with his razor sharp insights, but the manner in which they're delivered can be a bit trite or downright cheesy. In that "Uh oh, Uncle Harry brought his guitar to the family dinner!" kind of way. You know what we mean!? So much so at times it's drawn audible cringes when played in the store. On second thought, we take that back. What are we thinking?! We'd kill to have Harry Shearer as our uncle! The thing is Shearer is such a master at assuming characters we can't tell if this is another role he's playing with tongue planted firmly in cheek. Regardless, if you have any mild-mannered, mild-tastebudded relatives whom you think need a little tutorial at the School Of Shearer, he's got his sharpened pencils at the ready. Give a listen for yourself!
MPEG Stream: "Addiction To Oil"
MPEG Stream: "Sugar Daddy"

SILVERMAN, SARAH Jesus Is Magic (Interscope) cd 14.98

MPEG Stream: "Ron Jeremy"
MPEG Stream: "I Don't Need Two Reasons"
MPEG Stream: "I Love You More"

SILVERMAN, SARAH Jesus Is Magic (Interscope) dvd 24.00

SKILLET LEROY & LAWANDA Backdoor Daddy (OST Grammofonpladen) cd 14.98
Our friends at Deep Note, the ones who brought us those two classic collections of 70's porn music of the same name have really out done themselves this time. Backdoor Daddy is a live comedy performance by Skillet Leroy and Lawanda Page (Esther from Sanford & Son) backed up by a funk band. For 33 minutes the team exchange insults (all of the most X-rated kind), with their randy remarks interspersed with raunchy live funk jams and equally nasty lyrics. Listen to the samples and judge for yourself.
MPEG Stream: "Backdoor Daddy [Excerpt 1]"
MPEG Stream: "Backdoor Daddy [Excerpt 2]"

SOUTHERN, TERRY Give Me Your Hump!: The Unspeakable Terry Southern Record (Koch) cd 16.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Few literary geniuses have warped fiction, cinema and reportage as much as Terry Southern. This twisted mind was responsible for film classics "Doctor Strangelove" and the screenplay adaptation for Evelyn Waugh's "The Loved One." His stories were adapted into cult works such as Candy and the Magic Christian. His vision was often diluted to make it acceptable for American palettes. Here is a selection of his work in the raw, read by such luminaries as Michael O'Donohue and Allen Ginsberg. Unedited, his work is much more brazen and similar to the comedy stylings of another shy visionary Chris Morris. Not for the faint of heart. (Review provided by AQ-sweetheart Dale Shaw.)
RealAudio clip: "Blue Movie"
RealAudio clip: "Rimmers"

SPAZZTIC BLURR s/t (Earache) cd 10.98
"Way beyond speed!! / Spazztic Blurr!!!! / There is no cure!! / For The Spazztic Blurr!! ... Let There Be Spazztic! -- Let there Be Blurr!"
Holy hell. We never thought that Earache would reissue this out of print record on cd! This 1988 LP of absurdist metal has been long sought after by Allan, 'cause he just loves the Spazztic Blurr song found on that classic Earache label "Grind Crusher" compilation. That song ("He-Nota-Home-Me-Marco") is found here along with 13 other examples of their brilliantly (?) mindless, stream of consciousness, dadaistic thrash songwriting. Ok, normally Allan doesn't approve of overtly silly joke bands. But these guys totally take their jokes into a shaggy dog realm of utter nonsequiturship. Lyrics about Burger King, boardgames, the Flintstones, the alphabet, hardcore punks and rappers...yes it's childish. But it's also 1988. And then there's the way they include descriptions of what's going on musically at each point in a song on the lyric sheet (some examples: "Distorted Guitar, Acoustic Guitar, Distorted Guitar, Acoustic Guitar...", "Total Speed Metal Ending", "Weird Effect", "Surf Part", "Isn't It Neat How This Songs Jumps Right In?"). They were probably a huge influence on John Zorn! Kinda like Dead Milkmen meets the Suicidal Tendencies, for fans of Ludichrist, Lawnmower Deth, S.O.D., 7000 Dying Rats, that sort of thing.
RealAudio clip: "He-Nota-Home"
RealAudio clip: "Def Metal"
RealAudio clip: "Mexicalli"

SPINAL TAP s/t (Polydor) cd 16.98
Spinal Tap's infamous "Smell The Glove" album now reissued and remastered, with 2 versions of "Christmas With The Devil" added as bonus tracks! An all-time classic, we don't have to tell you that. "Tonight I'm Going To Rock You Tonight", "Big Bottom", "Sex Farm" and all the rest never sounded better!

STILLER, BEN The Ben Stiller Show (Warner Bros.) 2dvd 27.00
Who else here owns a crappy fuzzed out fourth generation video dub of every episode of The Ben Stiller Show? I know I'm not the only one. It's almost like watching a watercolor rendition of a comedy series. But now you can own the whole thing (a mere ten years after its demise) legit, with crisp image, on this two DVD set. With a cast of uber-comedians: Ben Stiller, Janeane Garafolo, Andy Dick and the other half of Mr. Show, a.k.a Bob Odenkirk, it's hard to believe that the Ben Stiller Show has remained unavailable all these years. Possibly its cult status was guaranteed by the cast's truly fucked up and obscure choice of parodies like the Lassie recreation which supplants the lovable dog with a haggard, non-sequitur spewing Charles Manson (played to the hilt by Odenkirk). Or Stiller's own reccurring celebrity roast skit in which he impersonates Robert Evans and tortures the likes of Casey Kasem, Herve Villechaize and others. Those already intimately familiar with the show will be glad to hear that, along with all the original episodes, there's a plethora of bonus material including: unaired sketches, an alternate version of the pilot episode, two early parodies from MTV's version of the show, a behind the scenes special and, of course, commentary (including a hidden "easter egg" of Bob and Ben doing commentary for Melrose Heights). This two disc set is region 1, NTSC.

SUICIDE American Supreme (Mute) cd 15.98
When you listen to the audio clip we've put up for you, you're going to think we made a mistake & mixed up some totally different disc with American Supreme. It *is*, however, the new Suicide, but it sounds nothing like the old, amazing Suicide many of us know and love (ah, "Cheree"), and not only that, but if you had to predict what Suicide would sound like 25+ years after their heyday (not that they were ever that popular, mind you), what you hear on that soundclip is the *last* thing you'd imagine. Turntablist scratching, funky bass, bwang bwang bwang guitar, annoyingly echoey vocals, keyboards that'd be more at home on a Parliament Funkadelic record. I kid you not! I guess these guys should be applauded for, um, updating their sound -- namely, Alan Vega's doped-out vocals with the 'echo' effect turned to 11, and Martin Rev's worrisomely hip, um, programming on the keyboards. Oh man. On the other hand, a lot of people are falling for it, so... all I can say is: listen to this album before you buy it!
RealAudio clip: "A Life in New Fragments"

SUN CITY GIRLS Dante's Disneyland Inferno (Locust) 3lp 25.00
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
As promised, Locust Music has just re-issued the Sun City Girls' Dante's Disneyland Inferno. Long out of print, and never before released on vinyl, DDI was originally released in 1996 along side the fabulous 330,003 Crossdressers From Beyond The Rig Veda. Unlike 330,003 Crossdressers, Dante's Disneyland inferno is less likely to appear on anyone's "Sun City Girls album to own if you had to pick only one" choice. DDI is pretty much the Girls "spoken word" album (though not without its share of singing, of which there is much on here to boot) and as such is generally only good for one or two listens, kind of like God Speed You Black Emperor. Dominated primarily by the voice of Charley Gocher and accompanied by himself, the Bishop Bros., Scott Colburn + some special guests, the album isn't necessarily bad, it just doesn't lend itself to many repeat listens. The musical accompaniment to Gocher's sordid and seedy tales run the gamut of the SCG musical experience: off kilter beat jazz, improv. skronkery, world music tomfoolery and gloomy-folk freak out. And the poetics / songs themselves are two parts Grimm's Fairy Tales, one part Current 93 and 1.666 parts Ethel Merman on PCP. The end result of which is like a seriously disillusioned Tom Waits or a satanically possessed Violent Femmes, take your pick. As a bonus, you lucky vinyl buyers get an additional photo of the Girls and a comic adaptation of the song "The Brothers Unconnected" within this deluxe, double gatefold sleeve edition.
RealAudio clip: "A Secret Revealed Unwittingly"
RealAudio clip: "Helen Waite"

SUN RA / HENRY DUMAS The Ark And The Ankh cd 15.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
"In conversation 1966, Slug's Saloon NYC". That's right, not a Sun Ra jazz album, but a 25-minute long disc of spoken word -- the great jazz visionary Ra interviewed (and going waaay beyond the subject of jazz, of course). The discussion is accompanied by intrusive, eerie flutes and other musical interruptions, weird echo effects, plus lots of ambient background noise/tape hiss... a weird listen, even before you start paying attention to what Ra is saying: "The whole goal of humanity is to be destroyed", stuff like that... it goes on and on, unfortunately programmed as only one track. Probably a lot of really interesting wisdom to be found here, but we haven't had a chance to fully imbibe. Definitely one for Ra fanatics, and anyone interested in esoteric philosophies/ers.
Q. What's the problem with the black man?
A. He doesn't see me.

TEEN CTHULHU When Flesh Becomes Scabbard (Thin The Herd) 7" 3.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Completely crushing and gorgeously heavy slab of thick and sludgy metal. Think a little black metal, a little metalcore, a little Neurosis, a little Cradle Of Filth, a little spazzy screamo, and heaps of Black Sabbath, with lots of ambient interludes, tolling bells, creepy samples, howled and shrieked vocals, pounding drums, complex and dynamic arrangements and RIFFS RIFFS RIFFS! Full length coming soon on UK's Rage Of Achilles label.

TENACIOUS D The Pick Of Destiny (Epic) cd 16.98

MPEG Stream: "Kickapoo"
MPEG Stream: "Classico"
MPEG Stream: "Dude (I Totally Miss You)"

TENACIOUS D The Pick Of Destiny - Deluxe Edition (Epic) cd 27.00

MPEG Stream: "Kickapoo"
MPEG Stream: "Classico"
MPEG Stream: "Dude (I Totally Miss You)"

THOMPSON, HUNTER S. Gonzo Tapes (Shout Factory) 5cd box set 58.00

THREE DAY STUBBLE The Figshta Diaries! (Nerd Rock Music) cd 9.98
Those wacky SF nerd rockers are back. With, ahem, a rock opera. Three Day Stubble fans, you know who you are. If you're unfamiliar with this long-running local joke band, well, how do song titles like "Baby Butt Baby" and "Pee Pee Pee & Poo" grab you?

TOSCHES, NICK Fuck The Living Fuck The Dead (DSA) cd 15.98

UNCLE JIM Superstars Of Greenwich Meantime (Abduction) cd 14.98
OK, what would you think if we told you that this record is basically some white guy, sounds like he's in his forties, doing caffine fueled, stream-of-conciousness, foul-mouthed beat poetry backed by jazzy, exotic music? His intellectual macho rants are full of '60s references ("I know who killed Kennedy. It was Ladybird Johnson. She was the only one with the guts to do it.") and surreal stories (there's a whole story about yeti hunters) and other conspiritorial strangeness. He makes very little sense, talking his own brand of hep jive, spewing bile all the while.
So the question is, is this a parody? Or really meant to be taken seriously? Well perhaps not the latter, since Uncle Jim is apparently Alan Bishop of the notoriously confusional Sun City Girls, who are on hand to provide that background music, along with others including Porest. Of course even if you convince yourself that it's some sort of joke, that doesn't mean it's that funny or that you'd want to listen to it. So maybe it's better to decide that this IS actual serious poetry and if you work hard enough to "get it" it'll be brilliant. Or it's just something for hardcore collectors of everything by Alvarius B, Sir Richard Bishop and Charles Gocher, though presumably you all already got the previously issued limited edition vinly version of this...
MPEG Stream: "Liberties"
MPEG Stream: "Graduation Day"

USTINOV, PETER The Grand Prix Of Gibraltar! (Riverside) cd 15.98

V/A Celebrities At Their Worst Vol.3 (Mad Deadly Worldwide Communist Gangster Computer God) 2cd-r 14.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Long awaited volume 3 of the best bloopers comps we've ever come across. This is again a double disc set (actually, cd-rs this time, for some reason). While there aren't as many high points as on the first and second volumes, this is still gonna make you laugh. Highlights include Kurt Cobain (the infamous, disturbing message the doped-up Kurt left on writer Lynn Hirshberg's machine), Roseanne singing her infamous rendition of the Star Spangled Banner, GG Allin, Ozzy talking about eating pussy (yeah, Ozzy at his worst, what a concept!), the entirety of one of Madonna's Letterman appearances (she says FUCK a lot, gasp!), GW Bush, the Rolling Stones, Howard Cosell, X-Files outtakes, etc.
RealAudio clip: "Roseanne"
RealAudio clip: "Clovers"

V/A Celebrities at Their Worst, Volume 2.9: Bitch Bitch Bitch! (Mad Deadly Worldwide Communist Gangster Computer God) cd 14.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
While hearing celebrities make complete asses of themselves is always entertaining, the M.D.W.C.G.C.G. label is beginning to scrape the bottom of the barrel of this genre on this cd, and we really can't say any of this is outstanding with the exception of Courtney Love, who has such a way with making an ass of herself. M.D.W.C.G.C.G. should really consider releasing a box set of the best of Courtney Love, if only to piss her off more. A notable runner up on this one is Roger Waters, who repeatedly stops in mid-song to complain about the audience whistling and or setting off fireworks during his set. Also on this disk: Joan Crawford, Mark Lindsay, Sharon Tate, Joe E. Ross, Angelyne, Florence Henderson, Melvin Belli, Porky Pig (Mel Blanc briefly spouts naughty words as the loveable cartoon pig), Peter Frampton, Mae West, Talullah Bankhead, Dr Nina Simone, Joanne Worley, Billy Crystal, and more.
RealAudio clip: COURTNEY LOVE "track 4"

V/A Celebrities... at Their Worst, Volume 2 (Mad Deadly Worldwide Gangster Communist God) 2cd 15.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Guaranteed to be answering machine fodder for eternity, this is "2 1/2 more hours of bad acting, bad comedy, bad rock'n'roll, bad everything." Bloopers and profanity recorded but never ever meant for release, from 62 personalities including Barbra Streisand, Robin Williams, Stevie Nicks, Linda McCartney, Hank Williams Jr., Jim Morrison, Elton John, Tiny Tim, William Shatner, Brian Wilson, James Brown, Buddy Hackett, George Burns, Dean Martin, and the entirety of the out-of-print live Venom 7" put out by Ecstatic Peace, the one that was edited so that it consisted mainly of ridiculous between-song banter (if you can call comments like "Hell yeah!" banter).

V/A Crazy Guys: Gems Of American Comedy (Sanctuary / Living Era) cd 11.98
I (Allan) have been waiting for this to come out for a while. The reason why is that a friend of mine used to have an old 7" record from the '50s (it was his dad's, actually) by the comedian Wally Cox, who was apparently once known as TV's Mr. Peepers, also a Hollywood Squares regular and (we recently discovered) the grandfather of Courtney Cox. The b-side of the single was a silly sort of yodelling song but the a-side is what always cracked us up, it's called "What A Crazy Guy (Dufo)" and it's a monologue about a character named Dufo who's always getting himself (or others) into trouble. Cox does the whole thing in an Italian-American accent, like he's from the Bronx, and his delivery is so deadpan that it's almost not comedy... certainly not punchline rimshot material. But we found it both weird and funny. We practically had the whole thing memorized, in fact. That was years ago, but recently I got to wondering if "What A Crazy Guy (Dufo)" or any other Wally Cox stuff was out on cd. Well, an internet search turned up this cd, not yet released at the time, that not only featured "What A Crazy Guy" but took its title from it. So I had to order it when it came out, and here it is! Dunno if all of you will find Wally's routine as funny as I did (and still do!) but even if you don't, there's plenty more on here to amuse. These twenty tracks are from the postwar era, spanning the years 1945-'53, and encompass classic vaudeville styled material (the disc leads off with a classic: Abbott and Costello's famous "Who's On First" routine -- if you haven't heard it in a while, it's still pretty funny) as well as more "modern" stuff like the beat/jazz humor of Steve Allen, and Stan Freberg's Dragnet spoof, for example. There's quite a few musical numbers, including an amazing bit of opera parody insanity from Spike Jones & His City Slickers. Musical yucks are also to be heard from Spike's competitors Red Ingle & His Natural Seven, as well as Bob Hope & Bing Crosby (with Doris Day), Jimmy Durante, Beatrice Kay, and Dusty Fletcher, amongst others. Then there's a bunch of what you might call "hick humour" on here as well, the best example of which might be "Deacon" Andy Griffith's "What It Was, Was Football", wherein a country bumpkin tells of attending, but not understanding, a football match. Other great names in comedy, like Jerry Lewis, Groucho Marx, and Victor Borge also appear. Certainly some of this shows its age, but really that's part of the charm. It's mostly still funny yet kinda quaint -- and sometimes not very PC, as with Buddy Hackett's unfortunate "The Chinese Waiter". But some of this stuff is so different from what you'd hear from a comedian today that it seems NEW. You're not quite sure you're even "getting" what's supposed to be funny about it (as opposed to what's unintentionally funny), which makes it seem weirder, which makes it funnier in the end... like the Wally Cox thing that lead me to this in the first place.
MPEG Stream: WALLY COX "What A Crazy Guy"
MPEG Stream: SPIKE JONES & HIS CITY SLICKERS "Pal-Yat-Chee"

V/A DJ Prank's Greatest Celebrity Phone Calls (Hip Hop History Series) cd-r 11.98
SUPER LIMITED.
Kathy McGinty lovers watch out! If you loved that prank phone call album and wanted to replicate the effect -- a preprogrammed set of responses to unleash upon unsuspecting folks -- here's your chance. And it's all Aaaahnold! Schwarzenegger that is. Plus Pacino and Pesci. You may remember these pranks making the rounds on the net a few years ago -- "I'm Detective John Kimball!" and "Who is your daddy and what does he do?" The calls even made it onto an early episode of the AQ Neighborhood Films series. So we've got 21 tracks of the existing prank calls (answering machine material for days!), 24 of the actual sound bytes so you can make your own calls, plus 9 bonus digital skratch DJ tracks -- perfect for DJs with cd scratchers. 55 tracks in all.
RealAudio clip: "You Love to Say 'Son of a Bitch'"
RealAudio clip: "Gateway"

V/A Gimme Dat Harp Boy! (OZit Morpheus) cd 15.98
From the label that brought us Dust Sucker and Mersey Trout (the Magic Band live in Liverpool) comes a collection of recordings -- from the 1920's to the 1960's -- which serve to illuminate the vast musical influences of the enigmatic and inimitable Don Van Vliet a.k.a Captain Beefheart. As one might imagine, such a musical map would surely cut a broad swath. While many of the tracks have a direct connection to the Captain's works like "New Minglewood Blues" by the Noah Lewis Jug Band, whose opening lines are exactly the same as "Sure 'Nuff 'n' Yes I Do". Other tracks, like those by Blind Willie Johnson and Rahsaan Roland Kirk point out obvious influences on Vliet's vocal style and proclivity for playing two wind instruments at once. While the majority of tracks here are early blues & string band recordings -- Blind Blake, Victoria Spivey & Lonnie Johnson, Uncle Bud Landress, Al Simmons, Blind Joe Taggert, among others -- there's also plenty of jazz cuts -- Charlie Parker, Cab Calloway -- and oddballs like Lord Buckley, The Fang and Hawaiian slack key players Kanui & Lula. On top of all this are interspersed rare tracks of the Magic Band, interview snippets and random remarks from Captain Beefheart. Whether you're a fan of Captain Beefheart or not, you just might like this collection anyhow as just an interesting mix cd.
RealAudio clip: BOSS-TONES, THE "Mope-Itty Mope"
RealAudio clip: KIRK, RAHSAAN ROLAND "Jungle Suite"
RealAudio clip: FANG, THE "Nervous Norvus"
RealAudio clip: CAPTAIN BEEFHEART "Little Scratch"

V/A History Of Hip Hop Radio Vol.1 (NYC 1986-1991) (Hip Hop Slam) cd-r 11.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
This one is for the bigtime old school hip-hop enthusiasts. Without a doubt radio played a huge role in boosting the NY hip-hop scene since the early 80's. This collection of NY hip-hop radio clips will make you feel like you are back in the Bronx in '88 staying up late and listening to Special K and Teddy Tedd on the fm dial to get your latest fix of what's new and hot in the hip-hop world. There are 27 tracks on here ranging from 49 seconds to over 8 minutes that are all snippets from various broadcasts of legendary hip-hop radio in NY from '86-'91. A piece of hip-hop and radio history.
MPEG Stream: "Mr. Magic on Magic 106FM WHBI"
MPEG Stream: "Chuck Chillout Gets mean on the Turntables KISS 98.7fm"

V/A Hollerin' (Rounder) cd 16.98
Truly amazing and strange collection recorded in Spivey's Corner, North Carolina in 1975 & 1976 during the annual "Hollerin'" contest. Developed out of a need for communication over long distances long before walkie talkies were invented, Hollerers soon developed their own unique hollers for various emergency situations. This disk contains some of the most advanced developments in Hollerin' and as such has some of the most amazing sounds you'll ever hear coming out of a human throat at high volumes.

V/A Industry Wannabes and Radio Anomalies (Mad Deadly Worldwide Communist Gangster Computer God) cd 14.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
You'd never accuse Mad Deadly Worldwide Communist Gangster Computer God of having much artistic integrity, after the hilarious if tabloidish collections of "Celebrities at Their Worst." "Industry Wannabes and Radio Anomalies" is a far more cruel piece of humor than its predecesor... one that you feel really bad for laughing at. Yet, laugh you will. The best parts of this collection are culled from tapes sent with the greatest of sincerity to record labels by chemically imbalanced individuals whose desire to be a part of the music industry far surpasses anything they may be able to offer to the industry. One such individual is Mr. Paul Super Apple - a huge Keith Richards fan who sent a tape to Atlantic Records desperately pleading with Keith to produce his songs, which have much more in common with the ironic pathos of East River Pipe than the Rolling Stones. The most bizarre tape is from J & H Productions - a fictional holding company whose spokesman rambles through an excessive amount of legalese in hopes of booking "all of the stars" for the biggest venues in Cinncinati. Follow all of this with some incredulous prank phone calls from "The Cambodian Refugee Center" to some conservative asshole in Garden Grove who is as dimwitted as he is confrontational. The prank begins as the telemarketer from the Cambodian Refugee Center insists that the person on the other end of the phone has signed a contract to adopt a Cambodian baby. Of course he hasn't and the exchange rivals some of the Great Phone Calls by Gregg Turkington. Quite amazing.
RealAudio clip: "Cambodian Refugee Calls"
RealAudio clip: "Paul Super Apple"
RealAudio clip: "J & H Productions"

V/A Lies, Sissies and Fiascoes: The Best of 'This American Life' (Rhino) 2cd 15.98
Eleven pieces culled from Ira Glass' National Public Radio show, with contributions from David Sedaris, Dishwasher Pete, and more. Contains the unbelievable "Hands on a Hard Body" piece, about a 'deep-thinking' trailer trash competition to see who can win a shiny new truck by keeping their hands literally ON it for three days straight. Bonus: gorgeous artwork from Chris Ware, creator of the Acme Novelty Library.

V/A Luna Park 0.10 (Sub Rosa) cd 14.98

V/A Music For Mentalists (Psychic Circle) cd 17.98
Most of the time, compilations are intended to bring you the "best" of something. This one, though, is different! The compilers have deliberately put together a compilation of the WORST. A collection of "the obscure, the peculiar, and in some cases the downright disturbing". And of course, we recommend it! Now, the Psychic Circle label is known for all their keen compilations of '60s psych pop, "instro-hipster" groove, glam rock, and other vintage obscurities. Many of their discs are compiled by Nick "Bevis Frond" Saloman, who here, along with colleague Mick Dillingham, delve into a very different, and certainly much less cool/good/valuable, section of what must be vast, vast record collections. The section labeled "incredibly strange (or daft) music"! Collectable perhaps, but definitely more as a compulsion than an investment. They're mostly flea market and junk shop finds, we imagine. Barmy commercial jingles. Novelty tunes. Celebrity cash-ins. Easy listening attempts to be hip. Embarrassing (though fairly witty) rapping by an old white Englishman promoting his darts themed TV quiz show. Disco-sploitation. Would-be exotica and/or erotica. Super sappy lovesongs. "Ethnic" oddities (including more rapping). Et cetera, et cetera. Like other Psychic Circle comps, it's stuff from from the '60s and '70s (though it's possible that the ones with the rapping could be from the early '80s), some tracks having an increased humor factor due to their datedness. The other humor factor: how terrible, terrible this music is. Quite painful some of it. But also really funny. And sometimes pretty darn catchy. Which actually is a dangerous thing - you might wind up with some really bizarre stuff stuck in your head as a result of listening to this. Don't say we didn't warn you. But who wouldn't want, ferinstance, "These Boots Are Made For Walking" as performed (for some reason) by an outfit appropriately called Balsara & His Singing Sitars stuck in their head? Certainly not you.
There's an overwhelming 33 tracks here (OMG!). And immediately you'll find confusional, cringeworthy fodder for your next voicemail greeting, or something to render the next mix tape (cd-r, playlist, whatever) you make just a little bit weirder! Most of the stuff here was previously quite unknown to us (though we venture to guess that if you grew up in the UK, there's a chance you might be more familiar with some of the entries). And even if we knew the artists, such as the celebrity contingent of David McCallum, David Carradine, and Xaviera "The Happy Hooker" Hollander (performing separately, not together, now that would be REALLY crazy), that didn't really prepare us for what their tracks were all about. Or maybe it did. Bizarre stuff in any case, as are all the rest of the tracks here, which include everything from Micky Katz's Yiddish version of "K'nock Around The Clock" to a silly shoe advert ("The Weakling In Thom McCann Shoes") to opera singer Cathy Berberian's faux-classical take on the Beatles' "I Want To Hold Your Hand" to a big band version of the Monkees theme to naive outsider homemade pop to discofied Pink Floyd. Just when you think it can't get any worse or weirder, it does!! And let's not forget, this starts off pretty insane, with track two being about the weirdest bit of civic boosterism ever, a song called "Energy In Northampton", commissioned by The Northampton Development Corporation and sung by one Linda Jardim, this song tells of aliens from outer space crash landing in the town of Northampton and finding it quite to their liking!
It's like Saloman and Dillingham took turns one-upping each other with the most absurd, atrocious recorded artifacts they (perversely) treasure... "Oh, you thought that was bad? Get a load of THIS!" and you get to hear it all, in its awesome/awful glory. The cd booklet provides some mercifully brief details about each track along with appropriate accompanying graphics in full color (and also reveals that most of the blame here goes to Mr. Dillingham, from whose crazy collection most if not all of these records were sourced). We're sorta surprised this is on Psychic Circle, and not, say, the Trunk label. This disc seems destined to become a beloved best seller... at least here at Aquarius!
MPEG Stream: LINDA JARDIM "Energy In Northampton"
MPEG Stream: REGINALD BOSANQUET "Dance With Me"
MPEG Stream: HYLDA BAKER "Substitute"
MPEG Stream: MARVIN JAMES "Together In Iceland"

V/A Music Is The Revolution (Zenta) cd 13.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Recordings of the legendary John Sinclair (manager of the MC5) and the White Panther Party, spanning 1968 to 1970. Most of the recordings on this disk were made at WPP committee meetings and feature some hilarious arguing back and forth about the revolution, guns, guitars, drugs and sex. But there's also some great solo rants from Sinclair and other heads of the WPP. An amazing document!
"As we learn the language of Marxism, and the language of the Black Panther Party, we'll be better able to explain to them what our program is, in a language that they can understand, because we have trouble explaining to the Black Panthers what the differences are between our two organisations. If we can explain that difference in Marxist terms, we could clear up a whole level of communication." So the disk begins, and it just gets better from there! Why they felt this difference ever needed explaining, we'll probably never know. Yet they proceed to argue themselves into a completely opaque ball of radical nonsense. For fans of "Rock, Rot & Rule", "Raymond & Peter", "Celebrities At Their Worst", that crazy guy who's always screwing up what would otherwise be perfectly good Godspeed You Black Emperor records, or anyone who's had to suffer through endless hours of tedious consensus decision making with messed up hippies and want to re-live the days through the safety of a cd player. Also makes great answering machine outgoing messages! REVOLUTION!!!!
RealAudio clip: "Guitar and Gun"

V/A Okkulte Stimmen Mediale Musik : Recordings Of Unseen Intelligences 1905-2007 (Suppose) 3cd 57.00
This 3cd boxset is a fantastical document of parapsychological research throughout the 20th Century, with recordings of purported demonic possession, glossolalia, precognition, poltergeists, and the already well documented Electric Voice Phenomenon. The latter had been the subject of research by noted parapsychologists Raymond Cass and Freidrich Jurgensen, whose work was collected on several cds released on the Touch label, one of which was the AQ perennial favorite The Ghost Orchid. The first disc of this set focuses on voices spoken through a person, who may not be conscious of the spirits controlling their words. There are several examples of demon possessed children, and a particularly creepy recording of a spirit medium who has contacted those who died in a plane crash and weeping through the medium to "move on." The second disc concentrates on Xenoglossy (the articulation of a language not known to the speaker) and Glossolalia (also known as 'speaking in tongues'), with examples of an English girl who speaks in an arcane form of Egyptian. There's also a few examples of Aleister Crowley famously channeling the Enochian language which the 16th Century mystic John Dee had also been known to conjure up. The third disc documents the sounds left behind by the spirits themselves, including paranormal music (that which has been transcribed from a deceased composer into the hands of a receptive living musician), the rappings of poltergeists within the walls, and the aforementioned EVP. A good deal of these recordings suffer from poor recording qualities that exacerbate the mystery of these spirit communications. From a strictly aesthetic point of view, we have long extolled the virtues of scratchy 78s, tape hiss, and surface noise as a patina of remarkable beauty and sublime power. This rusted sound makes things seems haunted to begin with, and then add the recordings of demons, ghosts, and other spirits, and we've got one thoroughly creepy and amazing document.
Includes extensive liner notes in both German and English.
MPEG Stream: "Jack Suttton Contacts Dead Airmen (1980s)"
MPEG Stream: "Banta Trance Speech (1948)"
MPEG Stream: "Spukfall Pursruck (1971)"

V/A Poesia Sonora (Zona) lp 24.00
Deluxe gatefold and 180 gram clear vinyl reissue of the definitive collection of sound poetry. Originally released back in 1975 by CBS Italy, features Henri Chopin, Brion Gysin, Paul de Vree, Ernst Jandl, Maurizio Nannucci, Franz Mon, Sten Hanson, Bob Cobbing and more.

V/A Sigmatropic: Sixteen Haiku & Other Stories (Thirsty Ear) cd 16.98
Upon hearing a few tracks of this compilation, a collection of musical interpretations of the haikus of Greek poet George Sefaris, former AQ staffer Marc Kate astutely identified the voice on track 13 as that of Lee Ranaldo, and posed the question: why is it that whenever Ranaldo does spoken word he's always yelling? Good question.
Anyways, there's a lot that is highly pleasing on this 22-track collection, but there's also an almost equal amount of the... how shall we say... uh, less than good. Problem is you have to suffer through the stinky ones (or scramble madly for your cd player's 'next track' button) to get to the quality stuff.
But when it's good it's deeply moving, intriguing and really impressive. However, when it's bad, well, it's really bad. Just think overwrought, "jazz-hands" hollering and melodrama. Ugh. Features the voices of Robert Wyatt, Cat Power, Stereolab's Laetitia Sadier, Howe Gelb, Alejandro Escovedo, Edith Frost, Mark Eitzel, Simon Joyner, Lee Ranaldo, Steve Wynn, Czars' John Grant, James William Hindle and more.
MPEG Stream: CAT POWER "Haiku Ten"
MPEG Stream: JOHN GRANT "Haiku Fourteen"

V/A Street And Gangland Rhythms: Beats And Improvisations From Six Boys In Trouble (Smithsonian Folkways) lp 16.98
Wow, what an amazing artifact! Smithsonian Folkways have just reissued this 1959 release of urban folk song recordings made by six 11 and 12 year-old youths from the Harlem projects. With only bongos and bottles to beat out percussive rhythms, the kids make rhyming songs, chants, and stories that relate to their experiences of rough street life and how they cope with them. An argument can be made that these recordings are the nascent beginnings of what would later become rap, but the song's basic forms sound much more rooted in early blues, call and response rhymes, and tribal African rhythms, in that they still have the feeling of being tied to an older tradition of folk music. That they are being made by kids with such exuberance and charm in the face of real hardship make these recordings truly special.

V/A Surrealism Reviewed (LTM) cd 19.98
A document like this is awfully difficult to listen to in the store, even more so than a number of the ultra-minimalist compositions that grace the experimental section. Yet, from what I could grasp, "Surrealism Reviewed" appears to be an important art-historical documentation of audio recordings made by the chief proponents of Surrealism and Dada, dating back as early as 1928 and including Marcel Duchamp, Jean Cocteau, Max Ernst, Tristan Tzara, Phillipe Soupault, Salvador Dali, Herbert Read, Lee Miller, Man Ray, Roland Penrose, Robert Desnos, Andrea Breton, Louis Aragon, and Antonin Artaud. Spotted with a few musical interludes (including the tango from the Bunuel / Dali film "Un Chien Andalou" and an odd "snapshot from the jazz age" by Jean Cocteau), this is mostly a spoken word document with poems, lectures, and interviews, spoken alternately in French and English, and the liner-notes translate some of the French texts into English. Highlights include the incredibly bizarre Dali interview, Duchamp's lecture elaborating on the poetry of mathematics as a metaphor for the creative process, and the amazingly contrived radio interview between Lee Miller, Roland Renrose, and CBS radio host Ona Munson.

V/A Today's Voices (Hyperscan) cd-r 12.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
In the "found" sound "field" recording vein of Kathy McGinty, Daddy's Curses, or Petros Drecojecai's Mistaken Receptions comes Today's Voices. We weren't given much information about the collection other than that it is a super limited edition (ie: a buy now or cry later sort of thing) and that the contained herein recordings are all of cellular phone conversations that were picked up via scanner between 1997 and 2000 (apparently the advent of digital cellular phone technology has made such scanning of cellular phones impossible). Clocking in at just over 70 minutes, there's enough strange, absurd and disturbing material within to satisfy even the most thirsty voyeur. And probably more unnerving is that most of the tracks for some reason only contain one half of the conversant parties, which makes 'you' the listener feel more like a participant than a casual observer. This odd lack of a second party to the conversation brought several of us here to the conclusion that it was the silent participant recording their own conversations. But listening to the variety of calls perhaps calls that conclusion into question. Either way, we have not been given any further info. It may not come as a surprise that a goodly fifty percent of the tracks are sex related; be they the belligerent rantings of young men trying to impress(?) the ladies on a party-line by calling them minotaurs and threatening to call CYS on them, the tentative musings of a straight man exploring his sexuality, or a phone sex chat line first date (complete with climax). While some of the phone sex tracks may put to test even the most iron willed, there are respites of interesting slices of life that are both intriguing and beguiling. There's the two old black guys complaining about the youth of today being nothing but "Charlie's children", a coked up soccer mom rambling from gift baskets to reject fortune cookies in under two minutes, bizarre nuage philosophy & advice, incomprehensible noises and more! Comes packaged with silk-screened artwork that's made to look like it could be a Folkways record. Great! Upsetting! Or just greatly upsetting!
MPEG Stream: "Charlie's Worried"
MPEG Stream: "Stag Line 2"
MPEG Stream: "Animal Smells"

V/A (NARDWUAR THE HUMAN SERVIETTE AND THE EVAPORATORS) Nardwuar The Human Serviette And The Evaporators Present... Busy Doing Nothing (Nardwuar / Mint) lp+calendar 17.98
If you love old school punk, indie pop, garage rawk, fun, AND you need help keeping track of your days/months/years (at least from May 2012 through to December 2014), then this is for you. Huh?! Please stick with us, it'll all make sense soon....
The inimitable Nardwuar The Human Serviette returns to the recorded realm, once more with his buddy Andrew W.K. in tow, along with a crowd of other musical pals. A lifelong championer of music's unsung heroes (mostly those with Canadian roots), a feverish pursuer of interviews with entertainment figures large and small, and a tireless digger-upper of the most obscure trivia morsels about said interview subjects, Nardwuar's latest musical offering is just as obsessive. It's a compilation which featured his own band The Evaporators (whose line-up currently stars bassist Stephen Hamm formerly of the infamous mid-'80s Vancouver punk band Slow and the New Pornographers' John Collins on lead guitar), Mr. W.K., Franz Ferdinand, Kate Nash, Sage Francis, The Cribs, Fuad & The Feztones (aka the latest Montreal outfit by Bobby Beaton and John Davis of the mighty Gruesomes with The Stills' Dave Hamelin and Liam O'Neil), and more. The baker's dozen selection is a split between originals by The Evaporators; the assorted UK, US and Canadian guests covering Canadian indie tunes originally by Pointed Sticks, Cub (Cup's first band!), The Dishrags, and rockabilly truck driver (!) Doug Rutledge; and yes, a brief interview clip (because it just wouldn't be a Nardwuar release without one, would it?). The Evaps sound beefier and better than ever. Although their songwriting still has a true unpolished garage rawk heart, the higher-fi production on this record suit them well. They sound huge compared to past releases, which is particularly appropriate on a couple of their songs here - namely, the title track (which, by the way, is not a cover of the Bing Crosby song of the same name) and the fists-in-the-air-smile-on-your-face anthemics of "I Hate Being Late When I'm Early". By now you might've caught wind of the latter, a wild'n'woolly duet with Andrew W.K. (especially if you attended SXSW last month where they played four shows, one with W.K. guesting on organ). It's a full-blown bombastic power pop song with totally silly lyrics (would you expect anything else from W.K. and Nardwuar?) and Sweet-esque vocals in the chorus that you can't help but sing along to. All in all, Busy Doing Nothing is a frantically paced gleeful collection of tunes sure to get you primed and ready for summertime.
But wait, there's still more fun packed into this release because Nardwuar The Serviette is a generous soul who always loves to dish out bonus gifts even if it isn't Christmas time or your birthday. Included with the vinyl is a 40-page calendar (yup, you heard right, forty, this ain't an ordinary twelve month deal!) filled with vintage black and white punk rock photos (from waaay back in the day circa '70s and early '80s!) by veteran punk rock photographer Bev Davies. She's snapped a plethora of awesome candid rock pics over the years, and she and Nardwuar dug through her enormous archive to select a choice few for this release. There are shots of The Cramps, PiL, The Cure, New Order, The Minutemen, Joan Jett, Girlschool, The Adolescents, Pointed Sticks, Iggy Pop, The Slits, Gun Club, U2, extras on the movie set of "Ladies And Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains", and James Brown. Wha'?! Yeah, that last one might seem a bit incongruous, but then again, he might've been more punk than any of the others, eh?
A super rad colored vinyl co-release by Nardwuar and Mint Records with handlettering completely designed and drawn by Cup!
MPEG Stream: EVAPORATORS WITH ANDREW W.K. "I Hate Being Late When I'm Early"
MPEG Stream: EVAPORATORS "Hot Dog High"

VORAK Triumph Of The Will (Destruktive Kommandoh) cd 9.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Is it a screeching petrodactyl attacking a piano? Wagner gone mad with a dr0000um machine?? Actually this is a Nietzsche-obsessed multi-instrumentalist manaic from Austrialia. Vorak is his one-man "black metal" band, and he's either got to be joking or he is totally out of his mind.
So totally demented, so totally retarded, Vorak's 1996 debut "Triumph Of The Will" might even edge out Benighted Leams' "Astral Tenebrion" as the most retarded black metal album ever -- which means it's so amazing you'll die. Among other things, Vorak plays fretless bass and vibraphone, but it all comes out as utterly nonsensical noise. Perhaps the only "metal" thing we've heard that's more fucked than Vorak are the mp3's by Exhumed Narcissist Paleontologist (http://www.reckankomplex.com/enp) but that's definitely a joke (being Keith "Hrvatski" Whitman's death metal band).
Why did a label even release this?? We don't know, but we're glad they did. We've been dying to share this with y'all ever since we discovered it a while ago, but only just recently managed to get a few copies of this disc, cheap. (Unbelievably, there's a second Vorak album from 1998 that's equally insane, but perhaps not surprisingly it doesn't seem that anyone we deal with stocks it!).
RealAudio clip: "Blitzkrieg -- Fighting Under The Rune of Triumph"
RealAudio clip: "Bloodlust, Discipline, Hatred"
RealAudio clip: "Hail The Nuclear Berserker!"

WATTS, ALAN OM: the Sound of Hinduism (Infinite Zero/Warner) cd 13.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE. SORRY
Reissued by Henry Rollins' (major) label. Alan dispenses wisdom over what has been described as a totally high-grade psych freakout.

WILLIAMS, SAUL Amethyst Rock Star (American) cd 17.98
Saul Williams is an all around Renaissance Man: an artist, poet, actor, writer, and musician, who was recently seen writing and starring in the film Slam. The guy does it all, and here we're treated to his music and his singular vocal method -- intensely rhythmic and declamatory utterances of his first-person poetry. Sure, "poetry slams" are kind of geeky (and I can't sit thru more than 5 minutes of 'em in general), but that's not really what he's doing here anyway. Williams' style is so epic and kind of apocalyptic that it works through the sheer force of his delivery. His poetry-slam-training is evident in his excruciatingly exact enunciation of Every Single Word, yet it really works (except when he attempts to sing and ends up sounding like a bad, wailing wannabe Eddie Vedder / Mike Patton).
And the musical accompaniment? It's decent -- and quite varied. Some tracks have atmospheric guitar feedback, the better to showcase the voice and creep out the audience. Other tracks feature modern 2-step-ish breakbeats, and yet others sound like Rage Against the Machine-style rock workouts complete with heavy pseudo-metal guitars and fingerpicking acrobatics.
Why doesn't Techno Animal get Saul to front one of their tracks? Have you heard their Dead Man's Curse ep, cos if you haven't now is the time! Look it up on the website; we've got a soundclip of 'em and I'll bet after hearing it you'll agree all parties would benefit from a collaboration.
RealAudio clip: "La La La"
RealAudio clip: "Tao of Now"

XYNFONICA A Feast For Famished Ravens (Hekaloth / Cyclops) cd 15.98
What we're about to say, we don't say lightly. Trust us. We may traffic in hyperbole. And our shelves may be stuffed with lots of 'best evers' and 'worst evers' and 'greatest evers', but this friends, is quite possibly the weirdest record we've ever carried. When we first threw it on, we were immediately struck with the realization, that what we were hearing, was either the most amazing thing we had ever heard, or absolutely the worst piece of shit EVER. Andee quickly decided on the former. And no matter how hard he tried, or how many repeated listens he was subjected to, Allan is sticking with the latter. But the more we play this in the store, the more the tribe of Xynfonica worshippers grows, Antaeus, Matt, Cameron, one can only handle a few listens before you're forever in its thrall. We're not sure how Allan does it, maybe there's some sort of chip in his brain, or maybe he's not really human at all, who knows. What we do know is we will wear him down, and just like you, faithful yet doomed reader of this list, he will eventually bow down to the damaged glory that is Xynfonica.
By now you're probably wondering what the fuck we're on about. Fair enough. So let's go back a bit. Not sure how we first heard about Xynfonica, but we got the disc in, it had an amazing cover, an old painting of some ancient battle, men on horseback, wielding swords, the record title: A Feast For Famished Ravens, song titles like: "From Your Father's Skull" and "The Viking Zodiac", a huge booklet jammed with more lyrics than could possibly fit in the three songs here, there are even footnotes!!! So we still hadn't listened to it, but we were pretty much sold already.
So we finally threw it on, and were greeted with some strange synthesizers, guitar synthesizers to be specific (we later discovered) and a growled demonic vocal, the synths, sort of atonal and detuned, like a demented Peter And The Wolf, the vocals, a strangled black metal rasp, so okay, we're thinking, a cool weird intro, so we waited for the band to kick in, and waited, and waited, and waited some more, scanned forwardÉ So then we thought, okay, maybe the whole first track is the intro, so we skipped to the second track, which of course started with the raspy vocals and the seasick synths, but we gave it the benefit of the doubt and waited and waited, scanned forward, and then it dawned on us. HOLY SHIT. This was the band. There were no drums, no guitarist. It was just some trollish demon and his damaged synth, spewing endless tales of mysterious battles and lost civilizations. And suddenly, it had us. Xynfonica. Sure it's creepy and demented, and borderline retarded, and the synths sometime sound so wrong it makes us dizzy, so 'off' it makes our eyes water, the melodies are demented, alien, creepy ominous one second, bouncing cheerfully the next, but always those vocals, an everpresent demon storyteller, it's hard to explain exactly why we're so taken, but we are. Every time we play this, initial reactions range from confusion, to hysterical laughter, to anxiety to sheer unadulterated joy. Imagine if Jandek was the keyboard player in a black metal band and decided to make a solo record, or imagine Mr. Roger's neighborhood but Mr. Rogers is out sick, so the dude from Abruptum is filling in, or imagine the music files from some medieval video game getting corrupted, and then used as the intro music for some evil metal band. Well you know, what? There's no need to imagine. It's all right here. Xynfonica will give you all of that and more. With just a rudimentary grasp of the synthesizer, and a frog in his throat, all will be revealed, and we shall all revel in his stumbling, confusional musical brilliance.
Xynfonica. Xynfonica. Xynfonica. Xynfonica. XynfonicaÉ
MPEG Stream: "A Feast For Famished Ravens Pt.1"
MPEG Stream: "The Viking Zodiac Pt.1"

ZEIGENBOCK KOPF I.D.M. LP (KSR) cd 12.98
THIS IS CURRENTLY OUT OF PRINT OR OTHERWISE UNAVAILABLE TO US AT THE MOMENT, SO PLEASE DO NOT ORDER IT. SORRY.
Review courtesy of AQ pal / Soft Pink Truth mastermind / Matmos co-mastermind Mr. Drew Daniel:
I've never seen an honest to God minstrel show in which white people dress up and perform as stereotypical black people. But the last show I saw by Zeigenbock Kopf was the queer equivalent. Ostensibly straight scenester cutie-pie John Dwyer (also of Coachwhips, ex-Pink and Brown, etc.) kitted out as Hans Bunschlapen in mustache and mirrorshades and backed up by shirtless go go dancers, pretended to be a gay German clone of the 70s, barking sadomasochistic slogans over superdistorted electronic chugging courtesy of bandmates Ulrich Bunschlapen and beatmaker Detlef. When Dwyer stays in character as Hans, Zeigenbock Kopf is some funny shit: imagine the "Sprockets" guy in leather chaps pulling a train on a Munich motorcycle gang after too much coke. To give Dwyer and co. their due, 70s gay clone culture and chilly German electro posturing *are* kinda silly, no doubt; the first Zeigenbock Kopf cassette "The Architecture of Dark Dance" ran with these clichŽs as far as they could feasibly go, and rocked to boot with hard, dark synth/gabber minimalism overdriven into Incapacitants territory. Funny and disturbing in equal measure, that cassette entered this particular fag's select pantheon of uncomfortably indeterminate queer-baiting comedy along with The Meatmen's "Tooling for Anus", The Angry Samoans "Homosexual" and The Frogs' "It's Only Right and Natural".
A joke band's only job is to be funny, but woe to the joke band that isn't funny anymore. On this release, Zeigenbock Kopf teeter on that brink, but at 23 minutes total they cut things off before it wears out completely. The motto this time around seems to be: darker, harder, dumber, and when Z. K. decide that just saying the words "I Dig Men" is, like, totally hilarious, the shtick threatens to wear thin, curdling into something just perfect for "Skit Night" at the frat house. I guess straight white male privilege and the appropriation of funny/"exotic" otherness go together like Crisco and fisting. If you can bracket the creepy/phony aspect of this project, the saving grace is that the music still rocks like a bastard: Whitehouse-ish scree spurts and Esplendor Geometrico-ish crunched beats and DJ Scud-ish breakcore and Suicide-ish synths and basslines fight for attention while Dwyer spits tuff, horny nonsense about what a hair-pulling, ass-slapping queer stud he is. Maybe when the penny drops and he comes out of the closet we can look forward to his "comedy straight guy" band in which he emotes about downloading Catholic schoolgirl web porn, fixed rate mortgages, and finding the right babysitter over bland MOR rock. Heaven help us . . .
RealAudio clip: "I Am A Slut"
RealAudio clip: "I Dig Men"